![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Dec. 26th, 2009 03:12 am[Filter: Private, in Kilian]
every single time I just feel so itchy. nothing to be done for it and I've practically given up on everything here anyway but ... but Mona wants to know.
there's something, with Benny. she was all weird on the day we had his party and ... I don't know. nobody ever wants to tell me anything. or her. I've seen the way they look at us like we're outsiders. why are we still here, still asking our questions, still sticking our noses in their business.
I just feel so itchy all the time and I know what it is, it's that I feel useless. I need something to keep my busy but Dragons if I know what and I just don't even know what I can do to make myself feel better anymore.
it wasn't even this bad last year. it was different. everything was sort of the same but I felt ... different. it's just been building and I feel like one of these days I'm just going to explode and send little Catriona bits flying all over. just worse and worse. itchier and itchier.
I ought to look for more answers but I feel so ... I ought to look for something. it doesn't even matter what I find as long as it's something. I feel so useless.
every single time I just feel so itchy. nothing to be done for it and I've practically given up on everything here anyway but ... but Mona wants to know.
there's something, with Benny. she was all weird on the day we had his party and ... I don't know. nobody ever wants to tell me anything. or her. I've seen the way they look at us like we're outsiders. why are we still here, still asking our questions, still sticking our noses in their business.
I just feel so itchy all the time and I know what it is, it's that I feel useless. I need something to keep my busy but Dragons if I know what and I just don't even know what I can do to make myself feel better anymore.
it wasn't even this bad last year. it was different. everything was sort of the same but I felt ... different. it's just been building and I feel like one of these days I'm just going to explode and send little Catriona bits flying all over. just worse and worse. itchier and itchier.
I ought to look for more answers but I feel so ... I ought to look for something. it doesn't even matter what I find as long as it's something. I feel so useless.
